Lawsuit filed over Wrong Sperm

No, I'm not making this up. Not even a little bit. Go read about it here and then come back:

http://news.aol.com/topnews/articles/_a/couple-sues-fertility-clinic-for-wrong/20070322065109990002?cid=2359

Okay.

Are you back?

Good.

While a part of me can understand why this couple might be upset...another part of me is truly disturbed by the following statement:

The couple says that they have been forced to raise a child who is "not even the same race, nationality, color ... as they are."

The couple also complains that the child is "darker" than either of them. "Darker"?

Okay, first off, I would agree that the couple SHOULD be FULLY reimbursed for the cost of the infertility treatment and any costs related thereto. The clinic made a mistake and these folks shouldn't have to pay for their services. And I would say that the couple should be provided with a full medical history of whoever's sperm DID get used to produce their child.

But, to ask for MONEY DAMAGES because your child is "darker" than you are? To suggest that the child is "not even the same race, nationality, color" as they are?

The child is, IN FACT, biologically related to the mother. So, any "race, nationality, color" coming from the mother are THE MOTHER'S race, nationality, and color.

And they have not been "forced" to raise her. The differences were apparent at birth. They could have chosen to place her for adoption. (I realize that is extreme. But, no one put a gun to their heads and said, "RAISE THIS CHILD OR ELSE.")

I believe I have previously discussed my cousin R~ on this blog before. R~ is tri-racial (her mother (my aunt) is white, and her father is black/Native American. R~ is stunning to look at. Seriously, she's gorgeous. Her skin is dark - kind of a beautiful coffee-with-cream color. (Do not flame me. R~ describes her own skin this way.) When R~ got married, she married a man named L~, whose mom was white and whose dad was black, and whose skin tone matches R~'s skin tone almost perfectly.

And they had a baby. A baby who is blonde and blue-eyed and whiter than a Swede in the middle of January. Seriously. And, since I am hestitant to post pictures of family members who have no idea I'm blogging about them, I will send you here to read about a couple who had the same thing happen to them (coupled with the fact that the mother delivered twins. It interesting. Go look and then come back again. Yes, I know I am sending you all over the internet today. Sue me. http://www.snopes.com/photos/people/mixedtwins.asp).

Anyway, my cousin and her husband are (happily) raising a child who does not APPEAR to be of the same "race, nationality, or color" they are, but who is, in fact, biologically their own. (And they APPEAR, to many people, to be a part of the somewhat largish Dominican community in the Pacific-Northwestern city where they live, which is just completely a false appearance. People speak Spanish to them ALL THE TIME. Neither of them speaks Spanish. R~ likes to respond by going, "Dude, I'm from Detroit. Speak English.")

My point is, APPEARANCES CAN BE DECEIVING. So, while I am sorry for this couple for probably having paid up the wazoo for a shoddy fertility clinic that mixed up some sperm, I am certainly not feeling any sympathy for them for raising a child who doesn't "look" like them. These plainitiffs would be a lot more sympathetic if they had chosen to couch their arguments in other terms.

But, what do I know? Since I actually chose to parent a child who "isn't even the same race, nationality or color" as me. Is there someone I can sue about that?

Feeling a bit snarky today,
LM