A Modest Proposal
There is an article on CNN today about "Mommy-Guilt". I would summerize, but, it's not a very long article, so, here it is.
http://www.cnn.com/2007/HEALTH/family/07/30/hm.mommy.guilt/index.html?eref=yahoo
So, my take on this article is that:
A. mommy guilt is inevitable and both culturally imposed and self imposed, and
B. having mommy guilt can cause your children to sense that you feel guilt and therefore make them feel badly because they know you feel guilty about something and assume it is their fault
Here's the thing: I AM TIRED OF MOMMY GUILT.
I am both TIRED of feeling Mommy-Guilt and TIRED of being told that I am, essentially, SUPPOSED to be feeling Mommy-Guilt.
I propose the following: STOP. FEELING. GUILTY.
If you love your kids, if you are doing your best, if you kids are eating well and getting enough sleep and fresh air and affection...just - LET. IT. GO.
Let it go. Stop feeling guilty. If you work and like working, be okay with it. If you stay at home and like staying at home, be okay with it.
Let's stop obsessing about our mommy-guilt. Let's accept that some moms are going to work and some moms are going to stay-at-home and some moms are going to breastfeed and some moms are going to bottle-feed and some moms are going to co-sleep and some aren't and LET'S CUT EACHOTHER A LITTLE SLACK. Stop feeling guilty. Stop imposing guilt on others. Live and let live.
And, finally, as part of my modest proposal - do something just for you and DON'T FEEL GUILTY ABOUT IT. Have some sex. Get a pedicure. Take a nap. FOR YOU. Just for you. Because it feels good or because you need it or because you need an hour for just you and you deserve that.
Have a mommy-guilt free day,
LM
posted by LawMommy at 1:10 PM
7 Comments:
Amen, sister. Amen.
Preach it girl!!! But sex for an hour...hmmm....I think I will just go for the pedicure LOL
What law mommy said.
I have no mommy guilt, i have no time to have it. I get a mani/pedi when the nanny comes and feel not 1 bit of guilt. I get my hair done. I think that taking time for me, even 1 hour makes me a better mom cause I am not soo stressed and in the moment.
Seriously, if you are doing the best you can, what else can you do?
I really don't have "mommy guilt" either. I can't imagine doing any more than I am already doing. I don't really want a pedicure though...that's not my thing. My idea of special "me" time is to get through the entire hour of Oprah without interruption. :-P
Really though, you can only do so much and be so much you know. Noone's perfect and I think it's good for your kids to see that so they don't grow up with such high expectations.
~Michelle
Amen! It's hard though, you know? Because there is always something that needs done.
I hear you. I have a moms night out tonight. I am sick, the girls are going to be with Daddy and you know what? I have no guilt about this. I just took the girls for the weekend and He had the whole time free. Now it is my turn. We are not just parents, but people too!
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