Smells Like Christmas

When I was a very little girl, before my parent's divorce - or, at least before my mother's remarriage - we spent Christmas Eve at my mother's parent's home. I would sleep in a big bed with my mother's youngest sister, who was only 3 years older than I. We would lie awake and wonder if Santa Claus would really come, and, if so, how he would get into the house, since it was without a chimney.

My grandfather was an engineer - an engineer who designed engines for a large tractor company that I won't name here. He had convinced my youngest aunt and I that the mechanism that allowed Santa's sleigh to run was HIGHLY SIMILAR to the mechanisms that ran his beloved tractors. Because he appeared to be able to make ANYTHING run properly - from dishwashers to the ancient Model-T he kept in the garage - we believed that he must know of what he spoke. My grandfather had us convinced that Santa Claus would stop at his house for an engine tune-up, sometime in the middle of the night, and that Santa would drop off our gifts at that time. No chimney, no problem. Have a brilliant grandpa who can fix Santa's sleigh, THAT was the answer!

I'm not sure how I thought OTHER CHILDREN, children whose grandfathers weren't necessary to Santa's operation, got THEIR gifts, if THEY didn't have a chimney. Evidently such a question never occurred to me. (As it also did not occur to me that a sleigh pulled by magic reindeer should not actually NEED an engine tune-up from a tractor engineer...)

My grandparents were raised on rice farms in north central Arkansas, and they brought their Christmas traditions with them to Michigan. When my aunt and I would run downstairs on Christmas morning, we would find our stockings stuffed with whole pecans and oranges and tangerines. (And we always ate rice with butter and cinnamon for breakfast, and it wasn't Christmas with a pecan pie.)

As I grew older, I learned that Santa Claus did not bring oranges, tangerines or pecans to my friends, and yet it didn't occur to me to wonder why not. I still loved to crack the pecans open - there was something truly satisfying about cracking open the hard shell and digging out the meat of the pecan - something I only did at Christmastime.

Husband purchased a bag of oranges late last week, because Lana asked for them. We've never been big eaters of oranges around our house, they are a pain to peel and eat, and both Husband and I, usually, if we're going to make the effort to eat citrus, prefer grapefruit. But, Lana wanted oranges, so oranges were purchased.

On Christmas Eve morning, I sat at our kitchen table, peeling an orange with a Pampered Chef citrus peeler (which, I am telling you, for .75 is one of the best products I have purchased from any kitchen supply company.) Anyway, I was looking at the Christmas tree in our family room, and peeling the orange, and I realized that very little smells more like Christmas to me than the scent of a freshly peeled orange. I know that most people think of pine or cinnamon when they think about Christmas smells - but, to me, it smells like oranges, and brings me back to those magic Christmas mornings of my childhood. It could have only smelled MORE like Christmas if I had had some pecans to crack open at the same time.

I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas, filled with the smells that make you feel most at home!

LM

Bad Blogger

Why is it that the holidays are supposed to be the most wonderful time of the year, and yet I generally feel like I haven't got a second to just enjoy them?

Lana and Gabriel are practically apoplectic with excitement about Santa's upcoming visit. Lana is not keen on the whole, "we buy presents for eachother and then we have to keep it secret for a few weeks" thing. She wants to wrap the gifts and then have the intended recipient open them IMMEDIATELY. She is bursting with the desire to tell Husband what she and I and Gabriel purchased for him, and likewise to tell me what she and Husband and Gabriel have in store for yours truly.

(I have heard whispered rumors from the troops (aka Lana and Gabe) of "Hello Kitty" themed pajamas under the tree in my size. Is it sad and pathetic to be a 35-year-old woman who is happily looking forward to this rumored present?**)

We made cookies for Gabriel's class the other day, and I, through sheer random luck, found a recipe that makes AWESOME Peanut Butter Chocolate Chip cookies. And by awesome, I mean, REALLY REALLY REALLY freaking good. They were so good that I am going to link to the recipe, because, what I am saying is...they are GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD. So, the recipe is here. YUM. (You have the cream the sugars, butter and peanut butter together for a good amount of time.)

So, anyway, between all the Christmas shopping, baking, wrapping, and, oh, writing a fascinating (NOT!) 10-page brief on why the interest of a valid mortgage holder in good faith is superior to a leasehold interest in a piece of real property (anybody want a copy for some bedtime reading?) I haven't had a lot of time to blog. And I also had to evict a crack-whore and her pimp from a really disgusting apartment, so, hey, just call me "Santa Claus."

I've also been watching a lot of Ask A Ninja. Which, if you haven't been watching Ask A Ninja, YOU MUST WATCH. Good grief it's funny stuff. (Funny enough, for example, to make you forget for a few minutes that you just evicted a prostitute from her humble abode.) You will laugh like the laughingest laugher. Here is my favorite one so far, it's the Ninja speaking on The Hollywood Writer's Strike. Funny stuff, my friends, funny stuff: Ask A Ninja On The Writer's Strike.

Other media stuff I'm kind of obsessed with these days:
1. The new Finger 11 song, Paralyzer. Why do I love this song so much?? I don't know, but, I cannot get enough of it. The video is here: Paralyzer
2. ABC.com has put some episodes of "My So-Called Life" on it's website for your viewing pleasure. It's not "Veronica Mars", but, hey, it was a good show the first time it aired, and, honestly, are you going to watch all the reality tv crap they are going to start airing on Primetime? (Please say no. PLEASE SAY NO.)
3. Christopher Moore's book The Stupidest Angel. My new favorite Christmas book. (Warning, it does contain many swear words, zombies, and a talking fruit bat.)

Hope everyone else is having a calmer Christmas season than I am!

LM

**In the same vein of being happy about the possibility of Hello Kitty pajamas, a few weeks ago I was attending a status pre-trial on a case I thought was fairly straightforward. We were sitting in the Judge's chambers, and opposing counsel dropped a bomb on me that I was TOTALLY not expecting. I didn't have a pen out, so, I grabbed by purse and yanked out the first pen I found and began writing furiously with it. The judge and opposing counsel were quiet for a moment while I wrote, and when I looked up at them, they were both smirking. "Nice pen" opposing counsel said, and the judge laughed, and I realized I was writing furiously with a fuzzy, pink Disney Princess Pen. (The pen was Lana's. Not mine. I swear.) I blushed and then said, "well, I guess you gentlemen don't have any princesses at home!" Such is my life....

Panick-y

You know that feeling where you cannot concentrate on anything for more than 30 seconds and you feel like your head might actually fly off your body and go spinning around the room and your stomach feels like it is sitting directly underneath your heart?

What?

You don't have that happen?

It's just me then?

Huh.

I guess I must just be a FREAK then. Or crazy. Or possibly I dropped a speed-ball or something, but, I really think I would have remembered engaging in recreational drug use. (Kidding!!)

Right. So, I'm not sure what's brought on this feeling of panic, since I don't have any truly pressing issues right now. It started about 4:30 this morning. Maybe, actually, it started last night. I couldn't fall asleep until midnight, and woke up at 4:30, feeling like everything was, just - not right.

I kind of feel like I'm about to jump out of my own skin. (Well, that would be MESSY...)

It could be because I spent part of yesterday dealing with a completely OFF HER ROCKER distant relative of mine, who wants me to sue someone, over something stupid, and insane, and the fact that I explained that I could not (first and foremost because the person she wants me to sue is MY CLIENT and I'd rather not lose my license to practice law, thank you very much) didn't seem to get through her fantastically insane skull.

Sigh.

I've got a funny post percalating in my head about Lana's new mad language skillz, and I'll try to post it later today, since this post is kind of, well, a dud.

Cheers,
LM