Friday, November 03, 2006

A bit of steam to blow off

I had been hoping to hear from our adoption agency this morning. Hoping to hear that Lana’s documents have been approved and that we are waiting for Travel Approval. It’s been 7 weeks and 3 days.

No such luck. Not a word from the agency.

My hopes of having this child before January 1 are being dashed as each hour passes.

Gabriel wants to know when his sister is coming home. I would like to know this as well.
I’m cranky and ornery.

I’m deeply annoyed that certain spouses of certain clients of mine are incapable of leaving their children out of the enormous disasters that their divorces have become. I offer this bit of free advice:

If you must get divorced, for the sake of all that is good and right and holy, DO NOT F**K UP YOUR CHILDREN in the process. For example:

Do not tell them that you are going to put their mom in jail (especially when you do not have the power to do this and it scares the ever living crap out of them - which is pretty much ALWAYS, by the way).

Do not tell them that their dad is a no good slimy cheating bastard (even if he is).

Do not tell them that they cannot take dance lessons because their Dad is too broke or cheap to pay for them.

Do not tell them that their mom is a whore (even if she is).

JUST DON’T. For f**k’s sake. Get a grip on your own life. Remember that your kids love your soon-to-be-ex-spouse as much as they love you. It’s not a goddamn contest for the kid’s affection. Put your big kid underpants on and deal with it.

(I realize that the people who need to hear this advice are not reading…it makes me feel better to say it anyway.)



Anonymous Heather said...

glad to hear that I am not the only one having a crappy day-- misery loves company. I plan on turning the crap to sunshine by ordering dinner out and cuddling with my hubby tonight in front of the TV! Hope you get some sunshine in your day as well!

Friday, November 03, 2006 2:04:00 PM  
Blogger Nina said...

Sorry you are having a crappy day!

Don't the parents who are some point the two of you loved each other to have a child. Try to remember that BEFORE opening up your mouth.

Friday, November 03, 2006 2:33:00 PM  
Blogger Nicki said...

Haha - you have just described my husband's divorce (he didn't play the games, she did) and I think I've told you of the exact fall out of that particular trauma except - haha - it doesn't end! it just keeps going and going and going 6+ years later! Her email sig line even has nasty things to say abou ther divorce (SIX years later) and she lets her kids use her email so they read it too. Wheee!! Some people should not be allowed to have children.

I am so sad about the slow TA :-( It will come, I have no doubt. It will come. And I think you will have Lana before year's end. I was right about my premonitions with Chris so you can trust me :-)

Friday, November 03, 2006 5:35:00 PM  
Blogger Avonlea said...

Oh you are a brave lawyer to practice family law - the sad thing I learned (when I did this work as a paralegal) is that these people are entirely incapable of hearing this and taking this good advise.

Once you have her, the wait for the TA will seem like nothing, but still, I hope you get it very soon.

Friday, November 03, 2006 11:22:00 PM  
Blogger La Turista said...

Don't you just feel like it's the lesser of two evils sometimes? Or at least the lesser of two a-holes? God bless you for dealing with them ...

Thursday, November 09, 2006 5:29:00 PM  

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