Despondent

Neither David nor I feel like the interview went well last night.

Bottom line, our homestudy isn't done, and even though we have turned in all necessary paperwork for the homestudy, we haven't had the face to face interviews, and the fastest it will be done is four weeks from now.

There are two other families who have asked to be considered for Dung.

The social worker didn't come out and tell us that they were both farther along in terms of having their homestudy done, but, I think we both felt, from her tone, that we simply were behind the other two families and that we didn't have a chance in hell of being assigned to this child. She kept saying, "we will choose the family based on what is in the best interest of the child" - which makes perfect sense. And surely what is in this child's best interest is to come home as soon as possible. So, all things being equal, it would make sense to refer him to the family who will be able to bring him home soonest.

At the end of the interview, I said, "what I am hearing from you is that you don't think you will take us to committee to be considered for this child?" And then she stepped all over herself and said, "Oh no. That's not what I am saying at all, I'm glad you said something. No, I'll definitely present your family to the committee for consideration."

I also got the impression from her that the fact that I am not a stay at home mom might put us at a disadvantage against the other two families.

She didn't come out and SAY that. And she actually seemed to think that an ideal situation would be for us to receive our child in the summer (when my husband is a stay at home dad) and then I could take time off after the summer, which would give the child a lengthy period of home time...but, what are the odds of that happening for this summer - about nil. There is pretty much NO WAY we could get the paperwork done that quickly, and have the Vietnamese government approve it. NO WAY.

At any rate, she is going to call us next week to let us know when the committee will meet. But, my hopes for this child have pretty well been dashed, and it hurts. It hurts more than I expected.

All I can do is focus on the fact that I KNOW that there is a child out there who is waiting for my husband and I to come and get him or her. I wanted to believe it was this child. And I'm sad that it doesn't appear that is going to happen, but, I need to remain hopeful - our child is out there, somewhere.

Law Mommy